The song my dad sung when my siblings died

The phone rang and my mom answered. She never imagined the horrific news my grandfather was about to share: My dad’s two children from his first marriage had died in a plane crash. Scottie and Rhonie Rogers (ages 10 and 14) were last seen with their mom and stepdad on July 5, 1981, when they took off in a light airplane en route to Florida for a vacation. The plane never made it there. The newspaper reported that the plane was flying through a thunderstorm when it plunged from 11,000 feet to 4,000 feet. It dropped off the radar and…

A racially tinged comment about my wife — a lesson in forgiveness

June 14, 2020August 30, 2020 Categories: Loving Your NeighborTags: forgiveness · love · racism

I was at a holiday party talking with a friend when I overheard a woman behind me say the name of my wife in a conversation. I naturally started listening in and then realized that the woman, a friendly acquaintance, was talking about Raquel’s ethnicity. “I’ll tell you what,” said the woman snidely with a laugh, “she looks like a Mexican if you ask me!” (Raquel is Puerto Rican).

Take a break from COVID coverage — there’s wonderful news in your Father’s eyes

April 4, 2020 Categories: It's About TrustTags: faith · forgiveness · kids · love · parenthood

One time when I was about eight years old, I was outside with my dad when I heard a bird chirp a three-note melody: “tweet-tweet-tweet.” I looked over at my dad and said, “That bird’s singing a song,” and then I imitated it with a whistle — “tweet-tweet-tweet.” My dad’s face warmed; he gave a soft, kind smile; and his eyes twinkled.

I needed perspective: I found it with a simple Google search

March 11, 2020March 11, 2020 Categories: It's About TrustTags: faith · hope · love

The other night, I was lying in bed feeling anxious about a vexing situation that was out of my control. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. You’re blowing this out of proportion, I told myself, hoping it would help me stop mulling it over. It didn’t.

I found Jesus in Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood

February 16, 2020February 22, 2020 Categories: Growing PainsTags: disabilities · gratitude · kids · love

When I was three, I lost part of my dad that I never got back. He had a nervous breakdown when the two children from his first marriage died in a small plane crash. My mom told me that after that it was like Dad didn’t want to live anymore.

I saw a woman do this on a train and it impacts my marriage today

January 25, 2020February 2, 2020 Categories: MarriageTags: love · marriage · romance

A few years ago, I was on a crowded D.C. Metro car during rush hour when I noticed a young woman do something that caught my attention. She saw a guy at the other end of the car, waved at him and started plowing through the other passengers to get to him.

A dance that showed me what real love looks like

January 11, 2020January 25, 2023 Categories: Growing PainsTags: adoption · grace · love

I have friends who adopted a little girl from another country, and their child has some significant disabilities that require her to wear a brace on her leg. You would think that fitting braces for a child’s leg wouldn’t be a difficult thing, but it has actually been a long process that has been debilitating and painful for her.

My new year’s resolution: win my wife’s heart all over again

December 28, 2019January 5, 2020 Categories: MarriageTags: love · marriage

This past year was a hard one for my marriage. My wife had to take care of me for a few weeks when I got extremely sick. I completed the final manuscript of the book I’d been working on for over a year (the book, which is about building a happy marriage, required me to rely on her heavily for insights and edits). Then I got a new job, which resulted in us selling one house, buying another, jumping through five temporary living arrangements and restarting our lives.

What happened when my daughter saw me kiss my wife

December 7, 2019January 8, 2020 Categories: Marriage · This and ThatTags: divorce · family · love · marriage

One day, my wife and I were listening to a playlist of Disney songs with our two little girls when the sentimental love song “I See The Light” from Tangled came on. I walked over to my wife who was in the kitchen, took her in my arms and started dancing with her slowly. I could tell it caught her off-guard and embarrassed her a little — it came out of nowhere. Thank goodness she stayed in my arms and danced with me anyway.

My mom played a board game with me, and she changed my life

September 21, 2019March 11, 2020 Categories: ParenthoodTags: faith · love · parent

I’ve spent a lot of time on the floor with my kids playing with all kinds of toys, including blocks, baby dolls and board games. The kids love being there with me and I love being with them too. One person they can thank for that is my mom. Mom never had a prestigious job; she didn’t feed me organic foods; and she didn’t enroll me in a Spanish immersion school. We didn’t have a lot of money, so she didn’t give me lots of toys either. But here’s what she did give me: her time, her attention, herself. And in doing so, she gave me a…

Dear Ramón: a letter to my imaginary son-in-law

September 7, 2019September 6, 2019 Categories: ParenthoodTags: family · kids · love · marriage · parenthood

One morning when my youngest daughter was 3, she got out of bed, met me at the stairs, and with quiet sincerity said, “Daddy, I have a husband.” “Oh really? What’s his name?” “Ramón,” she said, pronouncing the name “Wah-mone.”

I went on a search for my fifth-grade teacher (here’s what I found)

June 8, 2019January 25, 2023 Categories: Loving Your NeighborTags: gratitude · healing · kids · love

As I clicked “publish” on my blog post, I had a faint hope that I would find my fifth-grade English teacher, Ms. Saucier. The blog post was titled “If Jesus were a fifth-grade teacher.” I had lost touch with Ms. Saucier several years before and despite online searches, I had come up with nothing. The blog post was both a tribute and a last-ditch effort to find her.

The unforgettable reason a dog named Spooky was saved

January 12, 2019 Categories: Loving Your NeighborTags: acceptance · grace · healing · love · sacrifice

My friend Ann was driving through the cemetery in the blazing heat one summer afternoon and her heart was heavy with grief. Her father had died four months before and nothing could shake her of the sense of loss – until suddenly, there was an interruption.

Lessons learned from running through the airport with a Christmas ham

December 22, 2018December 22, 2018 Categories: Loving Your NeighborTags: Christmas · friendship · gratitude · love

It was Christmas Day of 2002 and I boarded a flight to Milwaukee with a ham as a carry-on. The ham was a gift from my mom to my ham-loving brother. The ham was in a box, which I put in the overhead compartment next to my bag, and then waited to take off. Unfortunately, though, we sat on the tarmac for 45 minutes, raising the risk of me missing my connecting flight in Detroit.

Mom didn’t enjoy her last Christmas with all of her kids (and that’s OK)

December 1, 2018 Categories: ParenthoodTags: Christmas · conflict · gratitude · love · parenthood · sanctification

It was Christmas of 1984, and my mother crammed my three older siblings and me into a compact car and took us to Arkansas to celebrate the holiday. I vaguely remember it — my mother, on the other hand, remembers it quite clearly. Apparently, it was pretty rough. No doubt, putting one adult, two older teenagers and two small boys into a small car for six hours was a recipe for disaster. One of us — I shall not say who — was behaving horribly and Mom couldn’t seem to get control of the situation. She was exasperated nearly the entire time.

Joshua Rogers

Finding God in the Ordinary

Tag: love