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Posts tagged ‘conflict’

Mom didn’t enjoy her last Christmas with all of her kids (and that’s OK)

It was Christmas of 1984, and my mother crammed my three older siblings and me into a compact car and took us to Arkansas to celebrate the holiday. I vaguely remember it — my mother, on the other hand, remembers it quite clearly. Apparently, it was pretty rough.

No doubt, putting one adult, two older teenagers and two small boys into a small car for six hours was a recipe for disaster. One of us — I shall not say who — was behaving horribly and Mom couldn’t seem to get control of the situation. She was exasperated nearly the entire time. Read more

The most hurtful thing my wife ever said to me

Two years ago, my wife hurt me worse than she ever had before. Her big offense: She said something that wasn’t very nice. Read more

The reason an old coworker stopped talking to me

A few years ago, I had a coworker who was particularly unfriendly from the start. She barely even acknowledged me when I’d see her and say hello. Then one day, it changed. Read more

The Girl Who Got Pulled Around by Her Ponytail

One time I was at the bus stop and I saw a woman take her daughter by the ponytail, pull up, and force her to move down the sidewalk. As the girl walked forward, she tried to reach up and pull her mother’s hand away, to no avail. As the little girl cried and begged her mother to stop, a man standing nearby laughed about it, and the mother began laughing, too. Read more

A Painful Apology to a Kid at Church

I did not enjoy going to church last Sunday.

I took my three kids to the service by myself because my wife wasn’t feeling well. The journey started out well enough — we were in the car and only running 12 minutes behind when we pulled out of the driveway. But it was all downhill from there. Read more

Getting My Friend Back 25 Years Later

I didn’t have many friends in middle school, but I had Jeffrey Mitchell, and I needed him.

Some of the popular boys had started making fun of me, so I was growing increasingly uncomfortable in my own skin. Jeffrey didn’t seem to care.

We spent time at each other’s houses, hung around each other during recess, and sat next to each other when we had the same classes. This included Mrs. Silkman’s seventh grade English class where unfortunately, our friendship came to an abrupt end one day. Read more

Letting go of Offenses from 2016

There are very few sports events I’ve ever cared about, and when there’s an exception, it’s a big deal. The last time it happened to me was in 2001. Read more

I Don’t Even Like My Neighbor, Jesus – Now What?

Several years ago I knew this guy who wanted to be good friends, but he didn’t act like much of one. Read more

Healing the Wounds of Segregation in the Church

During my junior year at the University of Southern Mississippi, I invited a Yugoslavian student to a campus worship service that was organized by my church, which was predominately white. After the meeting, we were talking in the hallway, and he noticed a group of mostly black students meeting across the hallway. Then he asked something that caught me off guard.

“Why do the white Christians and the black Christians meet separately?” Read more

Sometimes the Truth (About Yourself) Hurts

One time, I told my friend Steve that I was going to ask God to humble me.  Steve said, “I wouldn’t do that.  Scripture says to humble yourself.  You don’t want God to have to do it.”

Along that vein, a few years ago, I embarked on a self-imposed, humbling journey in self-discovery in which I did interviews with five different people, asking questions that elicited mostly-negative responses about ways I could improve my impact on others. Read more